Some Happy News Turned Sad
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Hey Hey Its a Happy Day! I worked out for a full hour! Normally I put in my workout video and wind up on the couch cryin cuz I cant do it but I did all of this except the 5 minuet jump rope at the beggining because I have an extreamly low ceiling. I almost knocked the fixture off trying! It was really hard normally I try to either starve off the weight or puke it off and I was actually able to do this. Its a new vodeo that I got from Onespirit.com its from The Firm: Slim Without The Gym. It was 20-25 dollars had a video, resistance band, jump rope, and tention band. Which is actually a good by it all comes with a matching hotpink mesh bag to carry it all in. It surprisingly didnt feel like forever like they normally do. I kept thinging to myself the whole time that I am tired of being fat and that I wanna be thin. My goal is to get to 150-175 by the time I turn 25 and I am 23 and 5 months so I dont have long to lose it. My ex roommate said I was jelous because she is skinny and I am fat. I dont like skinny. I like that natural thinness. The long lean look (Ballerina style )not that starving to death would kill for a french fry look. My little girl is 3 and she is a Ballerina and and she was chunky like her Mommy and now she has these long lean arms and long lean legs and even though she is thin she has structure and shape to her, lots of strength. That is the kind of body that I want. I was a dancer and I still want to be a dancer but at my current size I cant do it and I know that if I dont get the body by 25 that I wont get it. Also I have started back to school Tuesday is my first real day of classes at the beauty college. I have already done some of the homework and read and took notes on chapter 1. This passed few years all I have done is get fatter and fatter and drop out of every school my mom put me in and just like losing the weight by my 25th birthday I am also going to finish at least one educational program. I really want to complete something and be thin and pretty for my baby. I have been a nothing since I had my baby and I wanna be something for her. As much as I just cried and ate a bag of chips writting this I feel better.