Thursday, October 09, 2008
I love when people ask me about my journey. It gives me cause to reflect and evaluate my goals and philosophies.
A fellow sparkster ask me for some advice, as she's having trouble getting motivated to make the changes needed to facilitate her success. Here is how I responded to her:
Hello. You asked about what I do to make things work. There really is no secret. The first step is to recognize that you deserve to be healthy. As a parent, and a woman, we so often look at things in respect to how they affect others, putting our own self-worth as being gauged by those we love. So, the first thing I had to do was to realize that I'm NOT doing this for my daughter, so she can have a healthier mother, or for my bf, so he can have a sexier gf. I'm doing it for ME. It may still be because I want to see my daughter marry and have children, and I want my sex life to be improved....but it's not for THEM, it is for ME.
Then I had to realize, and truly accept, that I have to be honest about what I do. What I eat, and what exercise I get. To be dishonest hurts no one but myself.
Then I had to understand...I control food. It does not control me. If I am faced with a huge cinnamon roll, I know that I can eat it if I want to. It is MY choice. Sometimes, I might find it worth the calorie expenditure, and limit myself to very low calories the rest of the day. Sometimes I will choose to split it with someone, and eat only somewhat fewer calories the rest of the day. Sometimes, I might choose to have just a bite, to satiate my craving, but have only a small impact on my daily calories. Other times, I might choose to avoid it altogether. The central theme being...it is MY choice.
Finally, I had to accept....this is NOT a diet. There is no "goal weight", after which time I can stop "dieting" and go back to living like I did before. If I do, I'll go back to weighing what I did before. So, I don't even have junk food in my house. My bf has ice cream in the freezer, but I have my own, healthy choice fudge bars. Once in a while, I might take a bite of his, just for the variety, but in actuality, it doesn't taste any better than my own, it just has more fat and calories. So, I CHOOSE not to eat it.
As for fast food....I don't avoid it completely. I just make better choices. I research the nutritional values of the places I like to eat, and choose those that fit with my goals. My personal favorites are McDonald's grilled chicken chipotle snack wraps, and Subway teriyaki chicken sandwiches.
And, (for the mother in us) Having only healthy foods in the house, is setting a good example, and starting your little ones off on a healthier life!!! My daughter grew up with my lousy eating habits, and now she has terrible eating patterns. But, she's an adult now, and all I can do is show her that change is possible, and hope she will find the desire to make those changes now, while she's young and it's much easier.
Here are two ideas that really stuck with me: "If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution."
and, life is a learning process. We make mistakes, and hopefully we learn from then, and use that knowledge to move on. Think of it like brushing your teeth. Just because you forget one night before you go to bed, doesn't mean you have failed, and stop brushing your teeth. It just means you missed a night. The next day, you pick up and go on, remembering to brush that night.
If any part of this helps you on your journey, then I am happy to have been of assistance.