Thursday, September 18, 2008
Okay, so now this will be my second "official" Blog entry, and already it feels addictive! I appreciate the replies you guys sent to me. I suppose it really does help to know you're not alone in your struggles. My experience has been that if your addiction is not "mainstream" like alcohol or drugs, then it is almost not worth mentioning. Even employers are empathic to those who struggle with alcohol or other substances, but try to tell them you are a "love addict" or "codependent" and see if anyone bats an eye. However, because of these I have lost a marriage and been fired from a job. So their consequences are just as real. Fortunately my church offers a support group called "Celebrate Recovery." I knew about if for over a year, thinking it was a glorified AA meeting. But finally, I thought, "Well my own peculiar addictions are about to ruin my whole life, so I might as well show up to the group one night to find out what it is about."
It was a glorified AA meeting....NO, just kidding! It was much more than that. People were there for support of so many issues: anger, overeating, childhood abuse, abandonment issues, smoking,...and yes, alcohol and drugs. But, basically, all are welcomed. That is cool! So I have sorta found my niche now. When I talk in a confidential group about being emotionally needy due to neglect from my mother and constant travel during my father's career which took him away from home, I don't feel so silly talking about the effects it has had on my life. I realize we are all hurting somehow. We all need love and support. Thank God I have finally asked for help, because I have spent so many years alone struggling and it's by God's grace that I am still here. I guess I kinda do "take one day at a time" now. All those overused clichés really work when one is ready to hear them. Like "KEEP COMING BACK!"