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Introduction Text I am 56 years old and have been obese nearly all of my life. It began when I was about 7 yrs. old and I've been dieting ever since. Off and on, yo-yo, whatever. Every diet known and then some. I just kept getting bigger every time I stopped a diet. Then I decided to quit dieting forever and I just ate and ate until I got to 460 or somewhere in that general area. I didn't have a scale and the doctor's scale didn't go up to a weight as heavy as I was. The last time I had weighed myself, I weighed 425 lbs and I was larger than that when my dad died in February of last year. It was a wake up call for me because he had a cold one day and the next day he was dead. I decided right then, I could keep up eating as he had done and end up dead the next time I caught the flu, or I could fight for my life. The first 92 lbs. came off pretty easily, but things are getting more difficult now. I also have Lupus and exercise is very difficult due to the joint and muscle pain, so I exercise indoors to stay out of the sun. I find that Richard Simmons and Leslie Sansone are wonderful programs on VHS and DVD to exercise to and not kill yourself trying! I have discovered in my last few months of not being on Spark People and that is I am a food addict. I can go for a long period of time being "good", but I eventually fall off the wagon like a drunk and eat my way back up the scale. I did that this past year from July until December when our "foster daughter" left her 6 yr old daughter and moved out of the area with her boyfriend. With all the stress of another child in our home after being an empty nest for all of 2 month, then CPS people and court for guardianship...well, I lost all motivation to stay focused and I started eating my frustration to stay calm. I have to learn new coping mechanisms....I hope to do that this year. I am 56; I have a son, 23, a granddaughter, 6 yrs, and my life-partner of 32 years, who is 54. We live on the desert in California and have 4 dogs, 11 cats, 1 corn snake, & 1 Senegal parrot. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it, lol!

New decade, new goals!! My goals for 2010 are: 1. To get more fit through exercise. I don't do enough of it because it causes extreme pain, so I avoid pain at all costs, hence I avoid exercise at all costs. Not a good thing... 2. To get down to 180 lbs. by April 25, 2011. I am trying to give myself enough time that I won't be overwhelmed at the end trying to get to "that number" - as long as I feel fit, I'm not going to freak out if I'm a few pounds over by then. Considering I started at 451 lbs. in 2006, I think I've been pretty laid back about the whole thing as it is - time to get cracking!!

I have a simple premise: I can eat anything I want to, but when I get to 1500 calories for that day, I am *done*, finito, finished for the day. Some days I eat cereal all day long because that is what tastes and sounds good to me. Some days I eat a sandwich and fruit for dinner and have eggs and toast for breakfast. I have low calorie popsicles from Schwan's and low calorie low sugar pudding and yogurt for snacks. I try to do some walking every couple of days and I swim at least once a week. Because I have Lupus, I have a great deal of joint pain and swimming and walking are about the only two things I can do without ending up in bed for a day afterwards.

I have SLE, (systemic lupus erythematosis), Crohn's disease, Reynaud's syndrome, Sjogren's syndrome, Hashimoto's autoimmune hypothyroidism, Psoriasis, Psoriatic arthritis, antiphospholipid syndrome & degenerative arthritis. In spite of this, or because of it, I WILL become as fit and as healthy as I can possibly become in this body I've been given!!

I am a 3rd degree high priestess of Pagan faith. I have been practicing for 14 years now. I love reading on my Kindle, crocheting, cooking and computing! And I LOVE SPARK PEOPLE!!

Add a Link Come Fly With Us @ Lupus-Team Butterfly! <link>www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=12811 </link> Weight: 460 - 3/3/06 265.0 - 1/5/12 165.0 - 12/31/12{GOAL) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Everything I need to know is revealed to me. Everything I need comes to me. All is well in my life." -- Louise Hay
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