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A year later.

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Hello. I'm Diane. Since January 2014, I haven given birth to two beautiful girls (January 2014 for the first and September 2015 for the second), quit my job, struggled with a generalized anxiety disorder (now medicated), lost my sister to a sudden death, lost my godfather to heart failure, and gained an extra 16lbs for a total weight gain of 60lbs since my biggest loss (120lbs in 2009). I lost it without pills or surgery. I used Spark People, exercise and healthy eating. Now that I've almost gained half of the weight loss back, I need a serious change.

My biggest fear right now is the daily struggle to maintain a positive attitude about myself. My self-esteem has plummeted in the last 3 years. I went from feeling pretty, sexy and awesome to ugly, fat and unwanted.

My biggest hope is that getting back to a healthier lifestyle will make my thoughts, self-esteem and overall outlook healthier too. This is the first time in my life when I'm acknowledging that I need support. I need friends. I need a network. I hope that Spark People can provide that again.

More importantly, I want to be here for my daughters. I want to live a long life. My sister passed at age 41. She had gastric bypass surgery and lost over 200lbs. Her heart suffered from continued loss and gain of weight. It contributed to her death. It scares me on a daily basis. I refuse to let my weight ruin the rest of my life or worse the life of my daughter.

Member Since: 5/4/2011

Fitness Minutes: 1,657

My Goals:
I'd like to lose 100lbs for my original goal weight of 170lbs but for right now, getting back to 205 would be great. That means losing 60lbs!

I also would like to start jogging. Afterall, I want to be able to outrun the zombies when the Apocolypse comes!!

My Program:
My program is in the process of being revamped. I want to do the gym 3-4 times a week where I focus on the elliptical, treadmill, circuit and weights.

I also want to focus on more yoga using the Wii. When I weighed 320lbs, the Wii helped me build enough stamina and courage to begin going to the gym.

Personal Information:
I am probably one of the weirder people you will meet, which isn't so bad! I'm quirky, OCD and a little bit of a charming wreck. I wear my heart pinned to my shirt; and, I often spontaneously throw it at people. ;)

Other Information:
I love to read and write. I love when ink gets on my fingers. My favorite authors are vast but to name a few would include Charles De Lint, Neil Gaiman, Chuck Palahniuk and Ray Bradbury.

I also love music. I listen to 80's bands, oldies, as well as Death Cab for Cutie, Tori Amos, Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds, Modest Mouse, Florence & the Machine, Lady Antebellum, etc.

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