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ALEXMANCERX's Photo ALEXMANCERX SparkPoints: (0)
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5/17/11 3:10 P

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Ah.. Well I don't have saddlebags... Stomach has always been the hardest for me. xD

"The pen is mightier than the sword."


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TABBYARTS's Photo TABBYARTS Posts: 7,739
5/17/11 1:01 P

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Saddle Bags, Bubba. Saddlebags.
emoticon
TOBY the Magnificent

"Don't Dream It, BE IT"
(Rocky Horror Picture Show)


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5/17/11 11:35 A

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I can kinda feel the muscle too actually. Makes me happy. Just got to get rid of the extra fat to notice it... Not that there's a lot, but belly fat is the most stubborn!

"The pen is mightier than the sword."


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TABBYARTS's Photo TABBYARTS Posts: 7,739
5/17/11 11:28 A

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ALEX! They have found the gene that regulates the metabolism (but ours is set to LOW)
150 is my goal. I've got good muscle definition, I can touch it beneath my pudginess.
(hm, does that sound dirty?) So I've just gotta burn some of the TRANS fat!

"Don't Dream It, BE IT"
(Rocky Horror Picture Show)


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5/17/11 11:19 A

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Tabby - You can call me Alex. ^^
And yeah... Actually, I don't think a big muscle man is my goal, but a little muscle would be nice... Ideally, I'd like to be around 145 Ibs, and a lot of that be muscle. I'm rather short, so in the 130-140 range is supposedly the weight I should be to be 'healthy', but since muscle weighs more than fat, I think 145 is a good goal for me.

My boyfriend is a twig though, he's both taller than me and under 120 Ibs. I don't know how he does it, because yesterday he practically ate a whole pizza on his own... Might be because he's younger though. Curse his high metabolism! xD

"The pen is mightier than the sword."


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TABBYARTS's Photo TABBYARTS Posts: 7,739
5/17/11 11:12 A

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(ALEXMANCERX! ME TOO! but I'll settle for firming up what I've GOT!)
ISLANDBETH! BUSTED! your bad self !! I don't like SKINNY myself, but I'LL SETTLE FOR FIRMING UP WHAT I'VE GOT !!!!
Adonis, Aphrodite whatever. As long aas I make muscles!
TOBY/TABBY

"Don't Dream It, BE IT"
(Rocky Horror Picture Show)


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ISLANDBETH's Photo ISLANDBETH Posts: 1,499
5/17/11 10:51 A

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Toby, those are all valid points. You are right, the gay male community does tend to be extreme fitness-wise, though I do know a lot of soft gay guys who are perfectly loved by their partners.

I have found more acceptance from lesbians in regards to my size than from straight woman or straight men.

And I can be sizist the other way, which I try to work on. I met a hot dyke the other day and we were chatting and I looked over at the three women in bikinis who were doing fire dancing on the beach and said something about them being hot and she said, "Too skinny. I don't like a woman who looks like I could snap her in half." Well, on the one hand, I was pleased that she said that, on the other hand, I still aspire to look like those ladies!

How convoluted and f-ed up is that?


Island Beth
St. Croix, VI

I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center. - K. Vonnegut


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ALEXMANCERX's Photo ALEXMANCERX SparkPoints: (0)
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5/17/11 9:35 A

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pfft I wish I had the body of Adonis...

"The pen is mightier than the sword."


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TABBYARTS's Photo TABBYARTS Posts: 7,739
5/17/11 9:02 A

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Gay people have banded together during our generation and have worked real hard at re-educating the population but mostly, gay people ourselves. Although there have been support groups for over-eaters and fat people the focus is NOT to be fat. AND it hasn't become as political, except for airplane seats. The Feminist Lesbian communiity has tried to address this issue by featuring calendars with obese models. Though THAT sort of hatred is hard to obliterate.
Excuse me, but I worked many years at obliterating my body issues under a cocoon of fat. It was designed to keep me insulated from life. (Not that it worked, but I am SURE that THAT is still an underlying issue,to some degree. Fat is anti-social.
And a test for humankind (love me though you find me repulsive) It's no wonder that so many GAY people are overweight. But the gay male culture seems to have swung to the opposite extreme, with its emphasis on achieving Adonis status. (the BODY of DEATH) was the catch phrase in the men's community in the 80's and Phoenix. (I wanted to use that phrase in an ad campaign to promote safe sex (the County wouldn't fund it,and weren't so crazy about supporting a campaign for smaller families, either) I imagine that fat gay men experience discrimination from within the gaycamp as well as from the larger population.
Dang I'm chatty this morning. I'm up two hours earlier than normal. (Out of necessity, not choice) TOBY

"Don't Dream It, BE IT"
(Rocky Horror Picture Show)


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ISLANDBETH's Photo ISLANDBETH Posts: 1,499
5/17/11 7:02 A

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Sarah, I am with you... I was definitely called more names relating to being fat than to being gay. To this day, though I try to be pretty confident in every way, I can still be really self conscious about my weight and body image. Yet, with being gay, if someone makes comments, I don't get hurt, I get pissed if it is meanly meant, and I come back or if it is just out of ignorance, I make an effort to educate. Strange that I can't do that about fat.

Island Beth
St. Croix, VI

I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center. - K. Vonnegut


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ALEXMANCERX's Photo ALEXMANCERX SparkPoints: (0)
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5/16/11 2:55 P

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Parents words hurt the most. I find that things said by strangers don't hurt nearly as much as people I care about. The ones you love the most are the ones that end up hurting you the most, or vice versa.

"The pen is mightier than the sword."


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TABBYARTS's Photo TABBYARTS Posts: 7,739
5/16/11 11:44 A

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I would love to appear more androgenous. The hips and breasts are a dead giveaway.
(Unless you are an 8 yr old apparantly) I am rather pleased when people get confused.
But yeah, names. Mt brothers called me fat and gargantua (not because I was big but because of my stomping walk) And because I once had crooked teeth, that was always a self-conscious and painful experience. OOh! They had fun with Railroad Tracks and RIN TIN GRIN! Mom would try to stop them and counsel me about Sticks and Stones. But she was always teased in school. She would criticise herself in the dressing mirror, while "putting on her FACE". And she was envious of my breasts. I would have gladly given her mine!
Yeah, words cut deep. And we learn to despise ourselves at our mother's knee.
She told me that she dreamed of having six boys and living on a farm. And would always tell me about HER tomboy adventures. But she is surprised that I'm GAY?
Gimme a break.
TOBY
Dad was there. But non-interactive. (!)

Edited by: TABBYARTS at: 5/16/2011 (11:49)
"Don't Dream It, BE IT"
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STICKYPOP1's Photo STICKYPOP1 Posts: 673
5/16/11 1:30 A

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Fat was the big one for me. I could endure everything but when they would say fat and to this day I have to more conscious about having a more positive body image. I also make sure words like fat do not come in my house since I don't want to pass that on to my boys.

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ALEXMANCERX's Photo ALEXMANCERX SparkPoints: (0)
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5/16/11 12:23 A

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Tabby - I've had my share of the gender confusion. In high school people asked me point blank what my gender was. I always thought it was kinda funny when someone was confused about it. (that and I really like androgyny. xD )

"The pen is mightier than the sword."


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XENA1956's Photo XENA1956 SparkPoints: (0)
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5/15/11 10:11 P

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All names hurt but those that are affected by this type of thing never forget.

Teri
TheOlderIGetTheBetterIWas

If you’re going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now.
Xena1956


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TABBYARTS's Photo TABBYARTS Posts: 7,739
5/15/11 9:51 P

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I worked with kids a few years ago at the local summer school program.
I would stop the kids from saying," That's so GAY' used as a put-down.
I would tell them, "Don't be mean. Some of my best friends are gay."
That would floor them. The younger kids had trouble figuring out whether I was a boy or a girl. "That's kind of confusing, huh? I'm kind of both. But you like me anyways, right?"
They all agreed. I never got negative feedback from parents or teachers, but I didn't stick around for more than two summers!
TOBY


"Don't Dream It, BE IT"
(Rocky Horror Picture Show)


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5/15/11 8:52 P

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To be honest, being called something like "worthless", "lazy", or "stupid", hurts me much more than other words. Being called anything even remotely similar to "fag" or the like seem to have very little effect on me.

"The pen is mightier than the sword."


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RIPPEDPAUL1's Photo RIPPEDPAUL1 SparkPoints: (198,520)
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5/15/11 7:41 P

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Interesting although I was sad that there are so many other names that harm kids that weren't included. I certainly got called queer but I saw the most damage to the kids that were labeled stupid, lazy, bad, worthless.

4 Noble Truths

1. Suffering is a part of life
2. Suffering is caused by our attachments and avoidances.
3. Suffering can be ended.
4. Freedom from suffering is possible by following the Eightfold path.

Bigotry disguised as morality is still bigotry just as an outhouse with
marble columns is still an outhouse.
--D. A. Ridgely

co-leader of the following teams:
Bears, growling the pounds away, PHILADELPHIA IS ON THE MOVE,
Living Life on a Shoes


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JOOPRINCESS's Photo JOOPRINCESS SparkPoints: (0)
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5/15/11 7:00 P

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Ever been called a "fag" before? "Dyke", "Homo", "Fudge Packer", "Fish"? Words hurt. Here's a way to remember this and to get the word out that words can be just as harmful as fists.

www.thinkb4youspeak.com/

Tara

Co-Leader: Lupus - Team Butterfly
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=12811



�Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.�


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