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tried a new recipe
Saturday, January 12, 2019      7 comments

I tried a new recipe for my new lifestyle which is low carb which means no sugar and no flour. It is keto butter crackers. It is low carb friendly as well as keto friendly. They are very good. I have found other recipes I am planning on trying ... Read more
Went back into a Christian trg group and other news
Saturday, January 12, 2019      1 comments

As the title states I went back into the Christian trg group. This was only after talking to my former sponsor and asking for forgiveness and she gave it. I am redoing the steps with one big change. I am cutting out flour and sugar from my diet ... Read more
I need accountability stat!
Thursday, January 10, 2019      3 comments

Today I made a big decision when it comes to my health. As many of you know I struggle with my eating disorder and am also a Christian. As of today I made a covenant or vow to God when it comes to exercise and eating. I used a verse in the Bibl... Read more
week 57 of therapy
Tuesday, January 08, 2019      4 comments

This week in therapy we discussed my dropping my another sponsor again. Why I chose to do it is because he was not address the issue of the excessive weight and my ibs and how it affects my weight. I also am in the stage that I have chosen a rec... Read more
What a hassle!
Friday, January 04, 2019      4 comments

Since Araujo left now things have changed drastically. The one I dislike has taken over and I had a procedure today that normally goes off with a hitch when Araujo was in charge. Now that Dr. Stasi is in charge everything is in different. I have... Read more
Today I meet the new pain doctor for the 1st time who will treat my pain conditions
Friday, January 04, 2019      2 comments

Today I meet my new pain doctor. I am both anxious and excited. I am unsure what he is like. I only know that God is in control of the situation right now. I must be willing to give it to Him daily as I struggle with it. I know that I am weak He... Read more
week 56 of therapy
Wednesday, January 02, 2019      2 comments

This week in session we discussed Dr. Araujo and how he has affected me over the years. I told her about the time we spent together as patient and doctor and how we played online and I beat him. I also read the poem I wrote about the situation. ... Read more
Broken beyond belief
Tuesday, January 01, 2019      3 comments

Broken beyond belief Tears course down my face As I consider the years He cared for me Now He's leaving To care for others My heart's shattered Only my God can heal this For the pain is hard to bear I must entrust another... Read more
The dam of my tears has officially broken
Monday, December 31, 2018      3 comments

Today I got a card from my pain doctor. He was thanking me sending it to him and my kind words to him. As I read it I ended up crying because I will miss him greatly. It is not going to be easy losing him. As of Friday I will be seeing Dr Mike b... Read more
the amends begin again
Friday, December 28, 2018      3 comments

The amends for step 9 begin yet again. I have yet to tell my sponsor that a certain person I cannot make amends to because of undue harm to my mom and me. It is just impossible to make amends to her when she is the way she is. I will not name na... Read more
week 55 of therapy and stressful events
Thursday, December 27, 2018      3 comments

This week we discussed the loss of the friendship with Pam. We discussed how I was taking it and how it was affecting me. We also discussed my ibs where I am back at square 1 and not getting anywhere with it. I discussed with her the fact that m... Read more
New friendship is now dissolved thanks to miss know it all
Friday, December 21, 2018      4 comments

As the title states the new friendship is gone thanks to a know it all. Not only that the person lied to her and deceived her about us. In doing so she called us hateful and full of hate and told us in a text that we need to clean house! I feel ... Read more
week 54 of therapy and other news
Thursday, December 20, 2018      3 comments

this week in therapy focused on the fact that I am losing Dr. Araujo right now and I would have to find another doctor to replace him. This is what I was expecting but I cried during session and cried a lot since I am very close to him. My mothe... Read more
The Close of an era with a doctor
Monday, December 17, 2018      5 comments

Recently I found out for my pain management provider that he is leaving the area due to his grandmother getting worse when it comes to her Alzheimer's. We are very close as patient and doctor and the reason he told me this is due to the fact he ... Read more
Update on my recovery process
Thursday, December 13, 2018      3 comments

As of today I am finishing up my 4th step inventory and on Saturday I will do my fifth step and 6 and 7 step which will complete three steps all total. That will take a total of 2 hours with Connor Ryan which will take up a lot of my time on the... Read more

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