Marzipan candy and trash cans
Saturday, January 04, 2020
My boss gave me a beautiful box of chocolates for Christmas and my husband and I have been working our way through them over the holiday season. We're down to the last few and, horror upon horror, they're marzipan.
Marzipan isn't worth the calories. Marzipan isn't enjoyable. I'm not even sure the FDA considers marzipan food. I know I should throw it out.
Still, I feel guilty about wasting free candy. I'm worried that my boss will find out I didn't appreciate her gift and get offended. I'm worried that I'm going to crave candy later and there won't be any in my house.
I have spent years treating myself like a trash can - takeout I didn't love, leftovers that wouldn't keep, recipes that I botched, all down the hatch in the name of reducing waste. All this, at the expense of my expanding waist. But why?
I need to value myself more than the cost savings or social niceties of cleaning my plate. I'm 33, I'm not going to get sent to my room for not finishing dinner. And if I did, I would probably play Candy Crush and listen to true crime podcasts anyway.
As someone who spent her 20s in food insecurity, and her 30s (so far) with limited options due to celiac disease, I need to trust that there's better food out there for me to enjoy. It is not my responsibility to eat the food that no one else wants.
I am not a trash can.