Tuesday, May 14, 2019
I struggle with anxiety. For me, this means I worry a lot about different things, all the time. All day today I worried about meeting with a trainer as I had to talk about another trainer I wasn’t happy with. I was gonna run on a trail and asked the trainer if it was safe to run alone. He wasn’t sure without going into details here. So I went home. I live in a town that has thousands of miles to run on but I worry about it being safe and more. So much I feel trapped and my anxiety controlled all my actions and it’s always there to suggest a worry. I felt so trapped that I broke down crying. I imagine it might have been an anxiety attack.
I keep thinking I need to run if I’m going to do a half. Than decided its okay I didn’t. I’ll do it tomorrow. I started to feel better. I think I’m goi g to need to work up to running outside in my new town and perhaps treadmill run during the week.