Almost in tears today
Monday, January 14, 2019
Today I rewarded myself for reaching my goal (mentioned in previous blog post) and went shopping for new pants. Something I had been putting off out of fear, anxiety, and maybe nervousness of what my real size is. I have been wearing size 20 in pants with a belt but finally looked so bad I had to go shopping.
Buying clothes for myself has always been a dreaded chore. Either they don’t fit at waist, or not at hips, are too short, or worse the stores didn’t carry my large sizes. I’ve always been a Catherine’s shopper and buying pants was pretty much the same for the last 15 yrs.
Today I was able to shop at the regular size sections. Today I was able to find a few jeans that fit. Today I didn’t have the dirty looks sent my way as I tried on jeans. I don’t know why today was such an emotional day, it just was. Maybe it was realizing I was a size 16 (with wiggle room) or maybe it was realizing how easy it was and not so scary.
I admit I called my husband (the only person who has known my struggles and fears) in the parking lot and was in almost tears as I told him. It made a world of difference when he said he was proud of me and that “it’s about time you brought a pair!” Lol...
I hope this Monday finds you all sparking so bright! Thanks for stopping by!