How do you eat an elephant?
One bite at a time.
My mom always tells me that when I have a big task ahead of me.
I've been feeling impatient with the process, even though my results are really good. It's been 5 weeks, can't I just be totally transformed mentally and physically already?!?! I've been so good!
So I'm trying to focus on the positives.
My body is feeling stronger and healthier.
My digestion is all normal now.
Still alcohol free for 2018!
I feel good through a whole 60 min workout where 15 made me feel like I might die 2 months ago.
I'm feeling the difference in my clothes.
Dear Lover and family have started to comment on my weight loss (mine are all back in CA).
I can't believe how much money we are saving through meal planning and water drinking!
And, most importantly:
I'm alive, and (probably) healthy!!
I suppose this shouldn't come as much surprise, out of context...
I ended up in the ER with terrible lower abdominal pain a couple weeks ago. After 8 hours of extensive poking, prodding, and testing, I was declared too healthy to be sick or in pain, and sent home.
I was still in excruciating pain.
I called doctors and specialists and other hospitals, all of whom were incredibly gracious about going over all of my charts and recent test results, and all of whom came to the same conclusion: I am simply too healthy to be sick or in pain.
As validating as it was for my lifestyle changes to have the ask it nurse tell me she has never seen someone with such healthy scans and tests; to have pain no one can see or find a reason for is incredibly defeating. I couldn't decide if I was angry or scared or maybe I was imagining it.
For days I couldn't move more than a few steps and couldn't do anything but sleep and eat (fortunately my digestion and appetite were unaffected). It took close to 2 weeks for the pain to go away, and I still get pangs when I'm stressed.
There are lots of possible theories from the peanut gallery, some of them (endometriosis, for example) are quite possible, but can't be proven at the moment. I'm not looking for suggestions or theories here, please (unless you're a talented Michigan Dr interested in treating me for free!), I've had more of those than I can take for the time being, just sharing what I've been through recently.
Through all of this, and the birth of a new niece, (Check out the bassinet we refurbished for her!)
I managed, somehow, to stay dedicated to my healthier lifestyle.
I still drank only tea and water.
I chose healthy options and substitutions when we had to order in or eat out.
I resisted the temptation to emotionally eat.
I tried gentle yoga the first day I felt up to it and then my step workout the first day I felt up to that, but didn't allow myself to overdo it.
I found small craft projects I could work on while resting on the couch once I started to mend rather than taking the excuse to just be a slug.
I'm scared of not knowing what could hurt me so bad for so long, but I'm proud of the way I reacted to it.
The sobbing tantrum I threw telling staff they couldn't send me home in so much pain when they told me there was nothing more they could do for me at the hospital was not my finest moment...
AND, on a more positive note, once I was feeling a little better and able to go to a family bday party and to meet my new niece at the hospital, several people commented that I look like I've lost some weight!!!
19 lb and 7 in down so far!