Letting go is hard - like Tom Hanks knocking out a sore, infected tooth - with an ice skate - on an island - alone - HARD.
Because it’s scary. Because it’s painful. And because you have to do it on your own.
It’s easier to just stay in control of what we know.
For example:
I’m mad. I know what that looks like and I’d rather be mad than pretend it doesn’t upset me.
I’m hurt. I’d rather be in this pain than act like it never happened at all.
Letting go doesn’t mean that your feelings don’t matter, nor does it mean belittling what happened.
Pain is very real. Being angry (especially for a legitimate reason) is completely understandable.
Letting go, to me, means healing.
As well as protecting your heart from something that can destroy you... bitterness.
Bitterness will harden your heart to the point that you don’t even recognize yourself anymore and neither will anyone else.
Just ask my husband. For years he lived with a woman he didn’t even know and it was his own wife. Why he stayed with me, I’ll never understand, but I love him even more for that.
Letting go does not mean excusing what happened.
It doesn’t mean acting like the relationship isn’t damaged (whether by actions or words).
It means accepting/embracing it and making the relationship whatever it needs to be.
They may be family... you don’t have to be best friends, but you don’t need to be hateful or rude either.
There is wisdom and balance in what it looks like for different people and different situations, but one thing is certain...
Letting go of anger and pain is NEVER a bad idea.
Be BRAVE (like Tom ;) )
Accept it.
Learn and grow from it.
And, even if it takes years, decades... a lifetime... DO IT.
Work on coming to a place where you can let go, move on and actually LIVE (as yourself no less) the life God has given you.
Don’t let past events or people change who you are in a negative way.
Do not let the bitterness in... it’s very difficult to soften a hard heart, BUT thankfully, God is so good at transforming even the hardest and deadest of these. And I will be forever grateful for that.
Much love,
Em