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jokes and me time

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

This week for the Aspire & Inspire team we are to blog about me time.
Describe your ideal ME time especially during this hectic time of the year

I have a few ideal me time, The first is to sit down by myself and read
whatever book I am reading at the time. The second is to play game
on my computer, The third is to connect with one of my spark teams.
I hope whatever is your ideal me time you find time for it during this
hectic time of the year,

jokes hopefully

A guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender said, "Sorry. No pets allowed."
The man replied, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Browns game and you'll see."
The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.
The guy said, "Watch. Whenever the Browns score, my dog does flips." The Browns keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.
"Wow! That's one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Browns score a touchdown?"
The man replied, "I don't know. I've only had him for seven years!"-

The crowded store
It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store's opening time, in front of the store.
A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curses. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown to the end of the line again. As he got up the second time, he said to the person at the end of the line...
"That does it! If they hit me one more time, I won't open the store!"

I was checking out at the local Foodland with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those "Dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn`t get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "Divider" looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me "Do you know how much this is?" and I said to her "I`ve changed my mind, I don`t think I`ll buy that today." She said "OK" and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

On His Head A man walks into a bar with an apple pie on his head. The barman asks, "Why are you wearing an apple pie on your head?" The man replies, "It's a family tradition. We always wear apple pies on our heads on Tuesday." The barman remarks, "But it's Wednesday." Sheepishly, the man says, "Man, I must look like a real fool."
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