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2nd week blog and jokes

Sunday, January 17, 2016

Time for my weekly blog
thing i did good this week
a got back on the treadmill
b got a new job
c lost weight this week

thing I need to work on
1 get more strength training in
2 eat a little more
3 tracking my food
4 getting my 30 min of exercise in I only got 15 min in a couple of time this week but i did get 30 min in the rest of the week


The Teacher says to the class: Who ever stands up is stupid
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: I said who ever stands up is STUPID!
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: Johnny, do you really think that you are stupid?
Little Johnny: No Mrs., I just thought that maybe you are lonely being the only one standing.

Sam called his wife and said to her in a weak voice, "Hey baby, I was driving to a coffee shop to meet Mary when all of a sudden, a stray dog came in the way. I tried to steer left to avoid running it down, but the car skidded due to high speed, rolled over and almost ran off the cliff. The car was hanging nose down over the cliff, as I looked down fearing impending death. I just managed to climb out of the car and save my life, just before the car fell over the cliff crashing thousands of feet below and was blown into smithereens."
Sam continued, "I was taken to a hospital. I have a broken leg, broken jaw, dislocated shoulder and several injuries on my head."
There was silence on the phone, then the wife asked, "Who is Mary?"

two Priests are walking down the street when a drunk man comes up to them. He says, to the first Priest," I'm Jesus Christ." The Priest replies," No son, you're not!" So he says to the second, "I'm Jesus Christ." He says, "No, son, you're not." The drunk says," Look I can prove it." He takes the two Priests into the bar.
The bartender takes one look at the drunk and says," JESUS CHRIST YOU'RE HERE AGAIN!!!"

motivational quotes I hope
it' not whether you get knocked down; it's whether you get up.

If you fail to prepare, you’ have prepared to fail.” Mark Spitz

“The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in a person’s determination.” Tommy Lasorda
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