A Tale of 2 Faces
Friday, January 15, 2016
I remember back in 2010 when I started Sparkpeople how desperately unhappy I had become. I had split up with my husband (now ex), was burned out and work and my weight was close to being my highest. I was a complete couch potato and was sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Sparkpeople helped me try and focus on healing myself. I lost some weight and started exercising. The next 4 years I came and went off the website so my weight loss/fitness efforts were also sporadic. There were some happier times for me with my career and relationships however I could never get focused enough to "stay the course".
Last year I was determined to try again. But what I didn't know is this would be the try that finally took. I was hopeful and started strong as I had in the past. However the biggest difference was I didn't stop. Not when I plateaued. Not when the scale tried to make me crazy. Not when temptation surrounded me.
I spent more time learning about nutrition than trying to learn how to cheat without gaining. Seriously folks, in the past I almost always hit some point in my progress that I would literally self-sabotage by trying to see how much I could let slide while still telling myself I was working hard.
I don't think I really knew what working hard was until this past year. It takes time and effort and focus and desire and dedication and diligence.
The exercise doesn't happen without planning and getting up early or packing clothes the night before. The lunches don't prep themselves. Dinners out are almost always researched in advance. Grocery trips take longer because I read all the labels. I spend more money on better food than in the past. I am extremely fortunate to have a supportive partner who also has cooked healthier for me than he ever had before.
However I also didn't know how much better I could feel. I had no idea I could really run a 5k and keep running regularly. I didn't realize I could get strong and have muscles with definition. I had no idea how much cheaper it was to find clothes because thrift stores and consignment shops are filled with smaller sizes.
When you look at my face from 2010 and now in 2016 you can see a big change but it doesn't tell the whole story.