Tonight I decided I would ask the trainer to take a photo of me to see if I made progress from when the other trainer took a photo of me in April. Honestly, I don't really see a difference. I am not saying that to get compliments. I just don't really see the difference. Actually, I do. I am happier. I am stronger. I can deadlift 160#. I can run 8-10 miles on a whim. I run half marathons. That is nothing to sneeze at.
Here are the two photos. The first one is in April and the second one is today.
Even through I haven't lost a lot of weight in the last year, I have lost 5# between the two photos.
Since dating this amazing guy that wants to be healthy as much as I do, I find I really do want to be healthy and smaller. Yes, I know they don't always go hand in hand. But, I really would like to find myself back to 160. Somewhere in the last two years I seem to have lost my way in being healthy. I picked up some bad habits and misplaced some healthy ones. I want to aim to reverse that.
Honestly, with my bf at my side, I feel I CAN and it is possible. In our first few dates he said he wants to get healthy and I think he sincerely means it. From what I have seen he DOES mean it. We walked a Turkey Trot 5K this past Saturday and in the spring we will do another 5K. I hope we get to run it... hehehe! Here we are at the race.
Anyhow, we will be going on a trip to visit his hometown and meet his grandparents. I really would like to be smaller. Not because he cares or his grandparents would care. But, for me. I want to feel good about ME. He already loves showing me off.
So, I started to play with the goal weight calculator on here. It seems if I buckle down, losing two pounds a week, I could get to 190 (I am 205 now) by middle of January, a week before the trip. Than, I put in my birthday and apparently I could get to 168, almost my maintenance weight. That would be the best birthday gift to myself honestly. A voice inside is wondering if it is possible.
It made me think what I need to do in order to make it possible. I think I need to track consistently (harder than it sounds for me), work out 5x a week (I do 3-4x now) where I strength train and do 20 minutes of cardio.
It's scary for whatever reason that it's like right there but yet so far away. I know part of it is that I know I'll get the saggy skin and I remember how unattractive I felt. But, I cannot worry about my guy not liking me for it. If he does I guess he isn't the man I think he is. Maybe these are some obstacles, worries I can work through in the upcoming months.