On to Month Two

Jan-Feb 2015 Goals
Current Weight: 460.6
Goal Weight: 450.6
Weight Loss Goal: -10 pounds

Actual Weight: 458.0
Weight Lost: 2.6 pounds

Yeah, this wasn't all I was hoping for and I know a lot of it was caused by a mindset that just isn't quite there yet. I'm still in fake it til you make it mode, so it's hard to say no to things like I used to. That being said, a loss is a loss. I will do better next month.

Food Goals:
- Make good choices.

* I did this a lot, actually...just not as much as I should have done. Even when I was traveling I picked snacks and meals that were the healthier options - salads and dried fruit over burgers and candy bars. Valentine's day was...well, not good. I had more than my fair share of chocolate. But I tried to stretch it out over several days instead of eating it all at once. I'm so glad V-day is over! *lol*

- Log everything.

* This didn't happen by a long shot. Again, it's about being mentally ready for this and I'm just not fully there yet. I'm trying. I log when I remember too, but I know I'm avoiding it.

- Stay within calorie goals.

* I can't know how I did on this one without doing the one above...that's the main problem.

- Start finding schedule (eat every 2 hours).

* This was really hard to do with traveling, but I have been eating at more steady times throughout the day. Schedules are important for me because I know my body functions better if it knows when the next meal is coming.

Drink Water!

*This one I have done EXCELLENT at! If I could pick one major victory for this month - it's replacing water with most of the soda, sweet tea and other flavored drinks I was consuming. Now I can focus my efforts back on the food choices.

Walk when you can. Try for 3 times a week for 15 minutes a day to start.

* STILL struggling with this. I FINALLY have another appointment with a podiatrist and we've tried two different NSAIDs now. She has one topical one in mind for me, but my insurance company requires me to "fail" the first two oral NSAIDS before we can try the cream/gel. These NSAIDS are doing pretty much nothing, so...

Start working the handbike 4 times a week for 20 minutes each.

* I haven't been doing this and I have zero excuse for that. I can do it. And I should. But I haven't been. I'll try again next month.

Say nice things to myself.

* This is hit or miss for me. Always will be.

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Feb-Mar 2015 Goals
Current Weight: 458.0
Goal Weight: 450.0
Weight Loss Goal: -8 pounds

I need 4 each month, plus last month I only got half, so I need to make up those 2. This month will suck because we're trying to readjust schedules and I only have 3 weeks to lose. Let's hope I can squeeze 8 pounds out.

Right now I'm on day 2 of what will likely be a 5-day juice and smoothie cleanse. Basically, the idea is to break the sugar addiction hardcore and get closer to a plant-based diet. I really just want to see if this will help me break my mental ties with the food I've been consuming because I can't tell you how many "last times" I've been to McDonald's or wherever. It's gotten out of hand and my mental state needs a quick slap in the face. This IS doc approved. She knows what I'm up to.

Scales - I hate to tell you all this, but I NEED a scale. I know we're not suppoed to be slaves to the damn thing, and that will be fine when I have my body back and can go on how I feel, but for right now I need to know if what I'm doing is even working. My scale at home won't weigh me anymore, so the doc agreed that I could stop by once a week or so to check my weight. I'll be in Friday, the day after my juice cleanse ends.

What I'm struggling with right now is how I want to eat moving forward. I don't honestly think it's realistic for me to think of becoming vegan or even vegetarian full-time...especially since my protein needs will be so high post-op. But I do NOT want to be dependent upon highly-processed "fat free!" options either. My body feels better when it's eating veggies and fruits and lean meats. That being said, I don't want to have the feeling that I have to "give up" everything. I have done so many extremes, it's time for me to figure out what's going to work for me. I want to allow some cheat days, especially throughout this year because there ARE some things I'm probably going to have to give up altogether post-op. But I need them to be more rare...all too often I can jump off the mental cliff and one cheat day can become 5 or 10. It's a struggle. As much as people don't want to believe it - there is NO one-size-fits-all diet. I don't like all the things you like. I need to find a way to feel satisfied or I will end up frustrated and it will all fall apart. And, damnit, I'm a foodie so that part sucks! *lol*

So that's what this month looks like. Finish juice cleanse, probably allow a cheat meal post cleanse (because THAT is healthy! *lol*) and then start a mostly plant-based diet with lean meats and probably rice (because I can't quit rice!) thrown in. I also need to wrap my head around cheat MEALS and not cheat DAYS. Because that's a much healthier way to approach that concept of 90/10.

My way is not your way. Remember that.