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Questionable gut feeling

Sunday, March 01, 2015

I just can't put my finger on it yet but I'm feeling miserable and sad. There I said it. Usually, if I feel this way, I fake it til I make it. My 8yr old can detect changes in my attitude like a hawk (don't know if that was the righ idiom but you know what I mean). I refuse to let him see me like this. It is really dreary outside & Sunday---otherwise I'd drop him off and find an EA meeting. Then again, I have an associate there who told me a very distraught man in the midst of a divorce and subsequent poverty, recently committed suicide. I pass no judgment. Attending the mtg just might not be the right place for me tonight. I'll open my bible, see where I am led, I'll complete my Brene Brown book on Kindle "The gifts of imperfection) It is excellent...oh heck, it might be TOM ending and hormonal changes to my body. Will have to discuss with my docs but right now it feels like a sadness in my gut that I just can't reach. I'm on the verge of crying and curling up into bed but what good will that do me.

emoticon for the boys isn't cooked but I know my eldest will pull through. At 18, he doesn't understand depression (it comes and goes) but he understands his mother's imperfections. Thank you to my Higher Power for the strength to raise them all with compassion and a loving emoticon

I do have a 10 minute emoticon program called Headspace on my phone...I'll begin there, let my mind focus and wander and re-focus as instructed. Something may surface...

Do you ever get to a place where you cant put your finger on it but your gut feels there is something wrong?

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • JULIA211X
    Oh yes! It happens to me too, I go through sad periods for no particular reason. This winter weather doesn't help either. emoticon I also don't like my son to see me that way. When this happens I go to my favorite "happy" movie or shows.

    When my mom passed away, the only thing that would get me through the day was watching I Love Lucy episodes. Even though at times I would find myself laughing and crying! emoticon

    It sounds like you have a good plan, listening to your app, reading a good book, and blogging about it. I hope your spirits are lifted soon! emoticon

    1788 days ago
  • MERLE641
    I hate to say I 'used' to suffer from depression because I'm afraid it could back at any time. It's been about year since I had that feeling of a black curtain closing in on me. Looking back, I think I suffered for many years from a low level depression. Funny you should mention Brene Brown. I learned about her on Super Soul Sunday and took her class online. I think that show has been helpful in my digging myself out of that hole. I started a spark people team for fans of super soul Sunday. Please join if you are a fan. There is also in 'inner journey' team that I think may be helpful. Wishing you all the best. emoticon
    1789 days ago
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