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Just How I Feel About It

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Wanted to say more about my would be an eagle. When I think about it just sounds right. If was an eagle, if even just for a day or so then I could fly around and look in on all my family back in Texas. I would fly over and look in on my boys and nephews and see for myself if they were happy. See what is going on with my youngest and then I would know if he was happy and if it was just his Down Syndrome causing him to regress. See if my oldest was happy or not and see what my teenage son is doing these days. I would know how bad off my mom really is since she always keeps that from me cause she worries about my mental health and how knowing what is really going on in my family would affect it. Yes being an eagle for even a short time would let me find out if everything and everyone I worry about every night is like I thought it was. Also give me the knowledge to know how I can help them even though we are so far apart. Mom has always called me a worry wart cause I worry about everyone and everything even if it is out of my control. I never have cared even if can't change anything, I just always have cared that much. I am not good at hiding my feelings, I can't and won't harden my heart from the ones who are needy and innocent, and when I do guard my heart I am not happy cause don't feel like me.
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  • no profile photo CD3934996
    Always be yourself.. People always say you live in the Past.. but if I don't remember it I believe I would be out of sorts.. My Past caught up with me about 10 years ago.. I had to retire.. My Step Mom passed and then my daddy and my real mom.. I didn't know her but my husband convinced me to go home and be with my dad for about two weeks.. Best time ever.. I had been keeping a journal cause I would wake up in a panic attack.. Wow that was the first time I saw my father cry.. Everything I had written down was real places and things.. He rode me all over the place to visit and show me.. The last place was a Old Hospital and a man told me to leave because it was private property.. My question was do you have a key.. I need to put a dream to rest Please only five minutes.. Yes he opened and as a five year year old child I walked to the room and the table and the little chair was right there.. and I came back and my father and I left,, No more dreams.. So become the Eagle and dream sweet dreams.. God id watching as He watches over all of us.. You are a worry wart well so am I.. Put it in His hands and know that They will be safe and in His care.. God Bless.. In His Love and Grace Just Me Jane emoticon emoticon
    2244 days ago
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