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My Journey: Take Two

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Once upon a time(way back in 2010), I found Sparkpeople. Worked my butt off and lost 135 lbs. I was happy. Confident. Healthy. The end.

Or I so I thought.

Whomever said, "All good things must come to an end." seems to of had some inside knowledge into my life. It turns out, maintenance is super hard. Harder even than the journey to get to maintenance. It's super easy (for me,anyway) to slide back into bad habits. Turns out life is hard too and I am quite willing to use that as an excuse to indulge in said bad habits.

So here it is;

Three years in a nutshell(that's how long it has been since I have blogged)....

1. Broke a leg and two surgeries later, have limited ability to bend it. Also known as Excuse #1 not to go to gym.

2. Quit smoking for the millionth time and it stuck....YaY Me! Unfortunately, most of it stuck to my a$$. Code for: Eat all you want. We will work it off later.

3. Dr took my lymph nodes in my groin because he thought it was a reoccurance of Cancer and it caused Lymphodema. Excuse #2 for me not to go to the gym.

4. The single most painful event in my life occurred last March(someday, I may talk about it here but not yet). I struggle every day with whether I should get a divorce or not. My self-esteem is shot and I have gained 40 lbs. Excuse #3 to not go to gym. Also known as " let's eat all the chips we can and hope it makes us feel better "

As it turns out, chocolate really doesn't really mend a broken heart and "I'll worry about it later" doesn't really work for me. A friend told me lately that I have lost my spark. I really resent that I allowed someone else to take that from me and secondly, I took it as a sign that I need to be here on Sparkpeople. What better place to rediscover my spark, right?

So here i am. Ready to restart my journey.

Tomorrow I will:

1. Drink 8 glasses of water
2. Walk 20000 steps
3 Stay within my calories
4. Be kind to myself

That's all I can do right now but it's enough. 😀
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • NUMD97
    You popped up on my feed, and so I'm here stopping by. You're smart to realize that even in maintenance mode, the best place to be is here. So many motivators (the "official" ones anyway), once they back slide are too ashamed to show themselves in these parts.

    I am nowhere near mantenance, but I do know that without SP the 25-30 pounds that I have kept off for over six years now would surely be a thing of the past.

    So welcome back, and here's to new beginnings.

    emoticon emoticon
    2193 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/5/2015 2:23:41 PM
    Welcome back.

    I remember you were roller derbying and broke your leg...or something like that.

    I'm so sorry you're heart has broken. I wish only good things happened to you while you were away...

    Yes, drink your water and put yourself before your heartache.

    Time, that's what we all need.

    2203 days ago
    You can do it (again) and find your spark. I am just coming back as well after a few years of letting things slide and slide and slide. You are so right about maintenance being hard. Anyway, welcome back and do be kind to yourself!
    2218 days ago
  • IONA72
    Hope you can find your Spark, you were such an inspiration when you were last active here. emoticon I'm starting over too, emoticon Good luck on the journey. Hoping 2015 will bring fulfilment.
    2218 days ago
    Welcome back! I'm really just recently getting focused again too. Here's to rediscovering our sparks!

    Best of luck with your goals! The 20,000 steps sounds super intense for just getting back into physical activity. I hope you don't end up too sore to do more the next day! (Sometimes I've had trouble getting past 7,500 in a day when I'm not out & about a lot, so I set my goals around 10,000 or so because I know that with a little effort I can get there.)
    2218 days ago
    I think that is more than enough to start with for now, especially the steps; that many in a day is not always easy! I think those goals are very doable without being too easy.

    I'm in maintenance mode right now, and for me, it takes just as much work as losing the weight did, but it's worth it, you can do it!
    2218 days ago
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