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Looking back...and looking forward to my life

Monday, July 22, 2013

Sometimes I wonder if it's a blessing or a curse to have grown up skinny.

I was always a petite child and I actually had to start a food journal for my doctor when I was eight years old-who has the time to eat at that age? In third grade I was in hospital for surgery related to a kidney problem and I remember my mom taking me weekly to the doctors office to be weighed. I wasn't really interested in food at the time. I felt bad for my older sister who struggled with her weight and didn't like being chubby.

I stayed thin until my early 20's when I became comfortable with my life and just started to let things slide. I went from an active lifestyle (I liked long distance running and I commuted to university, so I had to park off campus and walk everywhere hauling all of my books) to working in an office where I had 30 minutes for lunch (I chose eating lunch over exercising).

My hubby, whom I starting dating when I was 18 years old (and 113 pounds), stuck with me despite the fact that by the time we were married six and a half years later I had gained about 50 pounds. He tried to talk to me about the weight gain, but I would become defensive and upset, so he wouldn't push me.
My hubby is a natural athlete-plays hockey in winter and golf and baseball in summer. He's not skinny, but he has an athletic build that he has worked on over time. When he was young he was chubby and I think he decided in his late teens that he wasn't going to be the chubby guy while at university. I still participated in some sports with him-I like golf and I tried co-ed baseball, but I still kept gaining weight.

Fast forward about 12 years of marriage and another 50 pounds. We had tried to get pregnant for only 5 months when we found out we would have a Christmas present! My doctor told me that other than being obese, my health was fine. Two and a half months before my due date, I had only gained 10 pounds. By the time I delivered, I had gained a total of 26 pounds. I managed a natural childbirth and had a beautiful baby boy. By my 6 week post partum check up, I was 7 pounds UNDER my starting weight. Can't blame pregnancy for my weight!!

Looking back.....I remember when I could sit on the bathroom counter to shave my legs. I remember when I wore whatever shoes I felt like....not thinking about can I bend over long enough to do up that little ankle strap or how far do I have to walk in those and will my feet get sore? I remember when I could run or at least jog... and not feel silly riding my bike.....and play jump rope...

Growing up skinny I took all of these things for granted. I am blessed that I wasn't teased about my weight growing up (I was just a "brainer" instead). My hubby and I both hoped that our son would take after my childhood metabolism and indeed it looks that way-he's 5 and 1/2 years old and still under 40 pounds. My son has played golf since he was 2 and is looking forward to finally being old enough to go to golf camp this August.

Looking forward....I will jog and run again.. and I will wear cute shoes.. and cute clothes. I have ridden my bike beside my wonderful hubby and my adorable boy because I need to be here both in body and mind...not watching from the sidelines, but participating in my life! I am down about 20 pounds and have alot to go.....but with the support of my hubby and my Sparkfriends I have hope!

PS. Sorry for the long winded story....and thanks for reading!
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  • no profile photo BABYSOX
    Thanks for an honest blog. I wish you health and success.
    2742 days ago
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