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So close I can taste it

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

And it kinda tastes like sweat, with a little blood mixed in for that extra kick. In this past week I've come away from training nights with more bruises and scratches and general pain and soreness than in the past, what, year?

I vacillate between telling myself "Why did I wait til the last minute to train this hard!" and "Where I'm at is where I'm at, and this fight isn't over yet."

Obviously the second thought is a more productive one. But I have my dark days (or dark hours, realistically - once I'm on the mat, I forget to be moody).

It's hard not to feel like I'm doing something wrong sometimes, whether it's my mood not always being positive and confident like it "should" be, or that I'm not being all aggressive and hard-working enough.

When people tell me I'm working hard, doing well, or all these questions are normal, I fall into that "but you don't UNDERSTAND... it's DIFFERENT with me!" trap.

If you recognize that sentiment, you were probably a teenager...

I know, everyone's different, everyone has their highs and lows, everyone has their little demons to face.

Maybe I'm just too much in my head.

I just need a hug. From a hot, local, single guy. Who totally wants me to win and get on with some one-on-one celebrating.

I'm accepting applications to be my post-fight private party. emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • KARA6410
    I was going to hug, then I finished reading and was like... oh.... not any of the above. Woops! I'm so excited for you! You've come a really long way and you're certainly my inspiration!

    emoticon
    3086 days ago
  • BREWMASTERBILL
    Oh wait, I am a guy.
    3087 days ago
  • BREWMASTERBILL
    I'm not a hot single local guy either. Plus I hate giving hugs. Damn, I'm worthless again. Enjoy the fight!
    3087 days ago
  • IZADORA
    Go for it!!! If I see any hot single guys, I will send them your way (they probably wouldn't speak much English and would need a plane tick tho!)
    3087 days ago
  • 4A-HEALTHY-BMI
    I'm not a hot, local, single guy, but here are some emoticon anyway. LOL

    Go get 'em, girl!

    emoticon
    3087 days ago
  • NIMNIX
    Haha thanks! I probably need more luck getting applicants for the screening process, by far the more difficult of my journeys. Maybe if I set aside some time for a social life...
    3087 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10470498
    Stopped by your blog, wow, what an incredible journey you are. Good luck with your fight and the screening process for your private party emoticon
    3087 days ago
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