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The Heat is Getting to Me

Saturday, July 07, 2012

It’s Saturday morning. I've been awake since 4:25 am. Five hours of sleep last night, thus breaking my streak of eight days in a row of sleeping for at least seven hours each night. Granted, Wednesday and Thursday nights were not as restful, what with waking up four or five times during the night. No, this morning I was awake because my husband was snoring. I tried to wait it out but after an hour my neck and shoulder started to cramp. Time to get up. So I’m fixing the coffee and my husband gets up because I got out of bed! I told him to go back to sleep, but he couldn't.

I have been grouchy and somewhat depressed since Wednesday. I had thought that I was just exercising too much. So for the last two days I've only walked on the treadmill for 30 minutes each day. Really, it’s 40 minutes if you count the warm up and cool down cycles. I did strength training, too. I do ST six days a week.

I've decided that some of my problem is the lovely 100 degrees plus temperature with the 70 degrees dew point and the high humidity. Not that I've gone out in it. Which means that I didn't reach another goal I had set for myself. I wanted to get out of the house more than twice a week. I set the goal at four times a week. Maybe that was too ambitious. Then again, we’re talking about going grocery shopping and doing other chores. Nothing I couldn't cope with. It’s not like I've had any panic attacks recently. Of course, I haven’t really pushed myself either. And I do okay as long as it’s not too crowded or noisy.

A friend of mine wants me to go to her church with her, but I've been pushing her off. I know she’s hurt with me, but she tells me the normal service has 300 to 500 people attending and as long as you’re not directly under a speaker, it’s not too loud! It’s hard enough to go to the church I've been sporadically attending and they usually have between 80 and 120 people in the congregation. How do I begin to explain? I tried to tell her, but she just looked at me funny. I mean, really. Do I say look, I’m afraid to go out in my own backyard by myself? Okay, this isn't helping. I need a positive way to deal with this. Is it better just to go ahead and do it? Can I pretend it better? I don’t know. Yet.

Until this last week, I've been wonderfully happy since I started here at SparkPeople. Other than time management issues, I've been doing well tracking what I eat and how much I exercise. So the last three or four days are frustrating me. Looks like the weather is going to improve here by Tuesday and the temperature will be in the low 80’s. I can’t wait. Yesterday, I had to really push myself to walk. I wasn't going to do the strength training at all, but I did. Normally, I do it way too late in the day (something I've been working on), but I didn't mind doing it at all. Yesterday, exercising was an uphill battle. I just did it, anyway. I was really glad I did. But then I wasn't hungry at all. It’s too hot to eat. Dinner was later than usual. That might be part of the reason why I didn't sleep as well last night, too. I think I'll just take it easy until this weather breaks. Just stay cool.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Linda, remember that you can take things at your own pace. What's right for someone else may not be right for you. May I suggest you simply tell your friend, "thank you so much for the invitation. at this time, I'm just not interested in attending with you. I will be sure to let you know if that changes."
    3198 days ago
    Linda, I know what it is like to try to explain to someone that you can't go somewhere because it would cause anxiety/panic attacks. I couldn't leave my house for over a year. I also couldn't talk on the phone not even to family. Some people just don't understand. I will tell you that being here on SP has helped me immensely! I have started getting out of the house and I am more actively involved in SP and my family is so glad that I call them even if it is sporadic. You are doing great! One day at a time. I understand completely. Let me know if you need to talk!

    3198 days ago
    You've made a lot of changes in a relatively short amount of time, which may be a bit overwhelming, and that's totally understandable. You're doing a great job though. Be proud of yourself, and be kind to yourself if your body or mind is pushing back. Take things step by step, you will do great :)
    3199 days ago
    Good luck - I am hating this hot weather too!
    3199 days ago
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