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My Body Feels Useless

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

My body feels useless since I can't have kids with my husband. I'm trying to think of a good reason to go on. Some people say that it's a blessing in disguise (not having kids) but people that tell me that have kids. My husband thinks some miracle will happen but I don't believe in miracles or magic. My husband & I are suppose to go on vacation to the beach this year & (besides my Husband & my cat Muffin) that's all I have to look forward to. When I get back, I won't have anything to look forward to except my husband & my cat. I am going to workout today since I'm off work. I'm tired since I woke up early today. Well going to go for now.
My husband doesn't want to adopt so that's not an option. My husband doesn't want to be a foster parent either. I just want to know how I can live the rest of my life without kids & it be ok?
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    My step daughter was never able to have children and her husband overdosed on a prescription drugs and died in his 30s. Her way of resolving her sadness was to get involved in her nephews lives. They have reaped the benefits of her love in so many ways. She still longs for children of her own and a husband, but she puts her best face forward and tries to be a light and good example to those around her. I think that helps her cope with the sadness.

    Another way to get your child fix is to volunteer at the park or with a Sunday school or 4-H group or with Little League. What are your interests? There may be a little girl out there that needs a positive mother figure as badly as you need to nurture a child. In the meantime write your feelings down. Mull over them for a month and keep tweaking on your letter. At the end of the month share your letter with your husband. He may be willing to compromise.

    Sorry for being so bossy, but I used to be a parent trainer in my former life and my heart reaches out to you while you are grieving. If this depression lasts more than ten days in a row, you really need to see a doctor. There could also be a medical reason for your difficulty coping.

    3366 days ago
    instead of adoption, be a foster family, there are so many children needing foster homes
    3366 days ago
  • 51NUME
    Please don`t be so downhearted. I have 2 friends who were both told the same thing as you and yet when they switched off went on to have a child each naturally. Relax, enjoy your holiday and who knows.
    3366 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10593563
    Just because you can't have kids with your husband doesn't mean you can't be an inspiration to someone else in your life. There are plenty of kids out there that need love and support from anyone they can get it from. Join a group or become a mentor. There are other ways to feel appreciated, you just need to look for them.

    Keep it up, WE can do it!
    3366 days ago
    Hugs!! Everything happens for a reason, you may not see that reason right now, but I promise, it does. Have you considered other alternatives for having children? I'm sure you have, but there are many children out there looking for someone to love them, and it sounds like you have a lot of love to give. I know this is a heartbreak, and take the time to mourn your loss. but you have many things to look forward to! Life is a journey with lots of loops and curves.
    3366 days ago
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