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1st week

Thursday, September 01, 2011

This weekend I had an epiphany...
It came via an angel that I thought was an asshole. No one has ever let me have it like that before, every guy I've dated has treated me as if I was a princess, I could do no wrong and I was perfect in everyway. After years of this I started to believe it too.. And every time something happened to prove that wrong I ignored it and pushed it away and used whatever and whomever to distract me from any feeling of un-perfectness. But having this young guy, as spoiled as myself, not accepting my b.s. (and genuinely wanting me to be a better person b/c he genuinely wanted me to be a part of his life) and showing me as I really was (a broken-hearted baby) flicked on a switch in my heart for the first time. I was wasting every day, not living up to my potential and not being a positive citizen in society. I need to change my lifestyle and my way of thinking about literally everything in this world. There are so many things out of my control in my life; smoking, drinking, eating, spending money, my o.c.d., my negativity, stress, being a workaholic, emotions and my happiness (or lack there-of). So currently I WILL get all of these things back into my "circle of control" althought it will require all of the effort I have. What's amazing to me is that just setting these goals and having a plan in life has done wonders to my life already. I have woken up excited to start the day every morning, I crave every moment I have to spend it planning and thinking about what I need to do to make myself healthier. I came accross SparkPeople.com as I was google searching diet plans. I don't believe it to be an acciedent, personally I know that God led me to this site. It's recources are everything I was looking for... a positive lifestyle program w/ a community family of supportive people going through something similar as I am. Im reaching out to everyone of you here, I need help. I do. I don't have the best support circle of family and friends, mostly b/c of myself and my previous love of isolation. please be here for me and know that I will be too...
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • DANA564
    What a great attitude you currently have and you are right, you are in the right place for support and encouragement. I stumbled upon SP by google search too (I had never heard of it) and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I have had a whole attitude adjustment too! And I'm feeling better each and evey day, more than I have in a long, long time. I'm glad you are here and I am looking forward to watching your journey to better health! emoticon
    3018 days ago

    Good for you taking back control!
    3020 days ago
  • *MADHU*
    emoticon emoticon
    3020 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.