Dont want to play Yo-Yo anymore
Monday, May 30, 2011
Well, my day was going great..I was on plan, I worked out and burned 418 calories.
I had hot dogs (yes plural) with ketchup and MAYO (what the heck!), too much macaroni salad, and cheesecake. Then, I also had some oreos and chocolate. WHAT!
I'm ashamed of this, and irritated with myself. I'm also trying to understand why I sabatoge myself.
I didnt wait too long to eat, in fact I wasnt even really hungry. No, i'm NOT afraid to be skinny (i think thats crazy), and no I am not being too hard on myself.
I lost 6 pounds last week, the week before that was a huge gain, and the week before that was a huge loss. Can someone say YO-YO?!?! I'm tired of it, but dont know how to get my mind to break the habit. Any little food can be a trigger (macaroni salad was the case tonight) and I guess I really just need to NOT HAVE ANY of those triggers..not even on special occasion, not now.
Now, i'm laying here feeling gross. My stomach is killing me because its too full, i'm upset because I was back on track and seeing a loss on the scale will be tough if not impossible. Hate this feeling. Hate that I have a binge eating issue.