Weight Last Week: 330.6
Weight Goal for This Week: 328.6
Actual Weight This Week: 329.4
Weight Loss/Gain This Week: -1.2 pounds
I'll take it! This has been a VERY hard week on my diet. I got almost all of my fitness in, but eating has been a bit of a joke with all the stress eating I've done, so, yes, I will take 1.2 pounds when I assumed it would be 0 pounds lost. And I'll take finally getting back to 329. It's all uncharted from here, and I'm ready to go...I think.
Week in Review:
Sunday was rest day. I rested. Pretty good eating all day ended with a 1/2 a small box of Cinnamon Life Cereal. Ate Subway for lunch...and too much at that.
Monday - Shoulders and Forearms. Did that. Good eating all day ended with a 1/2 a small box of Cinnamon Life Cereal.
Tuesday - Legs & Calves workout. Did that. Zumba. Did that. Good eating all day ended with Mexican that night, but I was a good girl at the restaurant, so there was progress. Also ate Subway for lunch but was MUCH smarter about it. Again...progress.
Wednesday - Chest workout. Did that. Cut the cardio because I was exhausted. Tried lentil soup, which I didn't care for, but discovered that lentils are magical "fill me up" food, so I'm tracking down a new recipe (my nutritionist is sending me one this week that she LOVES). Tried Moussaka and loved it. Going to try to take the skin of the eggplant next time though, as it made it a little tough to eat.
Thursday was a rest day. I rested because Zumba was canceled and I needed time to talk to Ethan more. Craved chicken salad again for lunch, but the calories in the version I bought at Krogers wasn't too bad. Ate some sushi too. NOM! Made Cassoulet for the gang (that's the actual name of the SparkRecipe) and EVERYONE loved it. WILL make this again with the new Dutch Oven Shane got me. *big grin*
Friday - Back & calves. Major failure. Pulled my underarm muscle. They're killing me by expecting me to do pull-ups at 330 pounds. EEP! Did the best I could, though. Spent the morning hanging out with Hubs. Realized Shoney's breakfasts are calorie killers. Spent time at the gym with Hubs and actually did 1/2 of W1D1 of C25k before the hip started hurting a bit. I call that progress. I also call the fact that the hip feels healed now progress. Didn't get much cardio in later, but bonded with Ethan at the second trip to the gym, so that was good. Had a meeting with the nutritionist, which I'll discuss in a bit...but she's given me some food for thought, that's for sure. Family game night following Logan's dance, where I realized that these snacking nights of pizza and M&Ms need to be changed a bit.
Saturday - Triceps & Biceps. Did that. Curled 20 lb. dumbbell on the preacher curl machine. Again, I call that progress. My arms are feeling it today, and I love it! Ate like crap. More stress eating due to fights with Hubs and worrying about Ethan. Did well in the morning with a protein shake, though...and that gives me a thought for the rest of the week...
So, let's just put it out there. My fitness is going pretty well. I get most of it done without hardly thinking. I love weight lifting so that pulls me to the gym nearly every day of the week. Where the trouble has come is from the diet.
I spoke with the nutritionist, and this is what we discussed:
* I told her that on Friday, following my first visit to the gym, I made myself a shake with frozen fruit (pineapples, mangoes and strawberries), milk, water, and a scoop of the Body Fortress Whey Protein (chocolate). It was a HUGE shake, and tasted amazingly good. I kept thinking, though, that I'd be hungry soon after. It wasn't until 5:30pm, as I'm sitting in the nutritionist's office that I realize that I hadn't eaten or even thought of eating since the shake. And I got a thought right there and then - what if I swap this out for my morning breakfasts?
Right now I generally eat 1/2 a bagel with 1 Tbsp. of cream cheese and 16 oz. of coffee with 2 servings of creamer. Problem is, I get hungry within 2 hours. Problem 2 is, I've been considering wiping coffee out of my diet, but couldn't get over the thought of only drinking water on my way to work. So maybe this protein shake would kill 2 birds with one delicious stone. I told her the idea as it popped into my head and she encouraged I try it. Starting tomorrow (granted, I have to go back to the store today and get more fruit...can't believe I forgot it yesterday!) I will make myself a HUGE protein shake and enjoy that on my way to work.
I tested this out yesterday and took my huge shake to Logan's school to watch his game. Once again, I wasn't hungry for hours. I was even offered a hot dog and I simply was not interested. If this works, I can also cut out one of my morning snacks and I can start seeing if I can stay on the low end of my new calorie range (1700ish calories).
* I have a problem with carbs. I never expected this to be a problem, but Gina thinks it just might be the cause of some of the plateau issues. The problem is not too many carbs, but too few. I'm having trouble getting all of my carbs in each day, while I hit every other range just fine, my carbs lag behind. So she said to give it a shot, watching my intake and hitting at least my low range carb limit...see if that helps. She told me to turn to more fruits (another reason my protein shake in the morning will work), beans and legumes (like lentils) and whole grain breads.
Truth? I rarely eat bread anymore. Truth 2? I don't eat enough fruits because I can't find a lot of good, fresh fruits anymore (stupid winter!). Truth 3? I've actually eaten more fruits and beans/legumes this week, and even though I expected to never hit 329...I did. So there. We'll work on it for the next couple weeks and see what we can make happen.
Now, why do I have this problem? I told her it's likely because when I doubt what to eat, I eat like my mom would. Mom had gastric bypass years ago, so carbs are the enemy to her. So it makes sense that if I'm following her diet, I'm not getting all the carbs my body needs.
* I'm not getting enough calcium. Yep, I confessed that I rarely drink milk anymore. I don't eat cereal (except when I go crazy a couple nights a week with Life cereal *sigh*) because I don't see it's nutritional value when compared to how long it keeps me full. I get dairy through cheese mostly, but no milk...and, honestly, I'm probably not getting enough dairy either. So, she said, as a woman now in her 30s, I need to either up the milk intake, or take a calcium supplement. Of course, we'll be upping the milk intake with those protein shakes in the morning, so that's just one more reason that might help me out.
* I eat too much fat. I've had this problem from day 1. The goals I always hit first are protein and fat. I still stay in my range, but I always have worried about the fact that I hit that fat goal before anything else. So we're going to keep an eye on it and see where my fat sources are...take stock of what I'm eating and what I should cut. One thing? I need to cut mayo almost completely from my diet. The other day I had a turkey sandwich from Subway with mustard, not light mayo...and it tasted just fine. So forget the mayo and add mustard...let's see if that helps first. Then keep an eye out to see where the rest of my fats are coming from.
* I have high days and low days. Usually after a high calorie day, I have one where I can't seem to eat because I'm not hungry. And I'm not talking a little change. I'm talking, I'll eat 2500 calories (500 over my limit) one day, and the next I struggle for 1300 (400 under). This just will not work. I'm going to work on balancing this out more. I think I'll be alright if I have some 2000 calorie days followed by 1700 calorie days - those are my ranges. I need to work on coloring IN the lines, not getting all willy-nilly with the thing.
This was a great session with the nutritionist, and I'm so happy to have her in my corner.
So, onto the plan for next week.
Dinners mapped out for this week:
Sunday - Pelmeni / Vegetarian Rice Casserole *
Monday - Chicken & Broccoli Alfredo
Tuesday - Keema (from Pakistan)
Wednesday - Coconut Crusted Mahi Mahi
Thursday - NONE (I work the paper, so I'll have to bring my dinner)
Friday - Garlic Shrimp Pasta
Saturday - Pizza **
Other options in my freezer/fridge/pantry:
* Tator Tot Casserole (might make this today too as a lunch option)
* Honey Garlic Pork Chops
* Grilled Herb Salmon
* Going to try to cook both today so there are options for lunches for the week.
** We're switching pizza night from Friday to Saturday so I can still have breakfast with Hubs on Friday morning. I can't do two large calorie-busting meals in one day, so I need to try first to split them up. It's either that, or we'll start doing homemade pizzas on Friday nights instead.
Lunch options for the week:
* Turkey sandwiches with mustard
* Leftovers (if there are any)
Workouts for the week:
Sunday - Rest day. I'll likely take the dog for a walk since it's nice outside today.
Monday - 5 min cardio warm-up. Shoulders & Forearms ST. 30 min cardio follow-up.
Tuesday - Zumba. Legs & Calves*
Wednesday - 5 min cardio warm-up. Chest ST. 20 min HIIT on elliptical.
Thursday - Rest.
Friday - 5 min cardio warm-up. Back & Calves ST. 30-40 min Cardio
Saturday - 5 min cardio warm-up. Triceps & Biceps ST. 30-40 min Cardio.
* I may miss my Tuesday night workout. Sucks, but it's because I might have a practice meeting for Vagina Monologues that night. We'll see what happens. I may have to simply sacrifice the gym workout and do something at work or home instead.
Other Goals for the Week:
Watch carbs this week and try to correct where possible.
Get my workouts in, and adjust where need be for other obligations.
Stop eating sweets. Stop stress eating!
Watch my fats and try to correct where possible.
Try morning protein shakes each morning.
Keep up the talking to Ethan. *
Weight Goal for the Week: 327.4
* One final update. I've been talking to Ethan a LOT lately. It's been very productive. I found out that it's not an issue with KIDS at school, but his advanced/gifted classes. He said that sometimes he skips morning session because they eat breakfast at school (it's free, so that's where I have them eat) and he's been getting scolded for it from the gifted teacher. She keeps telling him the reason he's so behind is because he skips morning session. So we talked about how we could fix that, and we bought him some bagels for that morning. Something quick he can eat while waiting for the bus, and then be full and ready for those morning sessions. (I had no CLUE they had morning sessions!) Second, he's felt like he's missed out on some things in his regular class because he's in this gifted class. I told him that I would pull him out of gifted if he wants, but he's completely conflicted right now. He loves his gifted class, but he hates that he misses regular class things (especially the fun things) because he has to go work on other things. He also missed the bus one day (for the first time ever) because the gifted teacher held him too long before releasing him for his bus...and that made him feel extremely guilty for making Dad come pick him up).
Thank you all for your comments. Right now we're working with him at home, trying to get him to be more honest with us, trying to take the time to understand where his triggers are. We will certainly seek outside help if that's necessary, but for right now, we're working into the "talking it out" method. Ethan's more like me than anyone ever sees. I felt that way a lot growing up, but I thought it was because of my circumstances (crappy father who liked to beat me whenever the wind blew)...maybe it has to do more with how empathetic we are as people. As I've matured, I've learned more not to take other people's rejection and disappointment so hard that it destroys my own feelings of worth and value. I still struggle with that, but you CAN learn how to work through that. It's a process, and a long one at that. I have learned that he wants to talk to me, but only when it's safe (i.e. his brother is not around, and usually Dad too). I've told him time and again that I just want to know what's going on, no judging, no wrong answer...and that has been helping.
I'll touch base with the school when I can, but as someone said, budget cuts have meant there is no devoted school counselor at his school. They do have a child psychologist who works the entire district, so (1) I would have to make an appointment with her, and (2) I'm not sure she'd know much about him or his behavior since she's rarely there. Until then, I'll keep an eye on him here, and I'll keep asking him how that gifted class is going. I may even call down to his teacher and speak with her. She adores Ethan and sees him all the time, so she would know better than anyone what his behavior is like in school and what upsets him. Maybe I can see if there's any way she can hold off the fun stuff until he is able to attend...maybe work with the gifted teacher more on the schedule so the gifted kids don't feel so isolated. Gifted programs are supposed to enhance and be a privilege, not a sacrifice that a 3rd grader has to make. Sure, later, he should have to decide what's important, but to a 3rd grader...well, he wants the best of both worlds. He wants to be stimulated mentally AND emotionally...and why shouldn't he be able to have that?