I'm sorry. Not a happy one.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
I am sorry because this is NOT going to be a pick me up, optomistic blog. I am crabby, I am in so much pain I cried home, and I cant get my eating under control. So I am frustrated.
Weighed in this morning and I GAINED 4.5 POUNDS! WHAT THE F@#$!!! Why the HELL do I do this TO MYSELF!?!?! I tried to 'indulge' like my leader suggested we do with the points allowance we are given each week and I FAILED. Why the heck do I forget that I AM THE LiLo of food?!? She cant be around crack and alcohol, and I cant be around trigger foods..It sets me OFF and my body cant handle it either and I gain like a mad woman. UGGGGGH! So back to square one with weight. GRRRRRRRRRR.
Next up, the knee. I went BACK to my uncle again tonight (per his request). This morning I woke up to throbbing knee pain again, and was limping all morning. Went to his office after work, he said its majorly swollen (not a good sign - boo). He did the laser again, adjusted my hip (also swollen) and low back. Then, he gave me arnica cream (on top of the 10 drops I take 3 times a day in water and YES, HE (the chiro) told me how to take it) so hopefully that will help. He also said tonight to sleep with it propped up on a pillow again, and to ice my low back/hip area, the back of my knee as well as on top of my knee. YIKES! And, to hit the swimming pool! So, swimming will be the adventure starting tomorrow.
I am seriously scared I wont be able to do this marathon now. I havent been told yet that I CANT do it, so I am still beyond praying and keeping my fingers crossed. PLEASE do the same! I would be so devastated if I couldnt run. You all know I would be crushed.
Thats all right now. I am in a dark place, and I need to get out of it. I pray pray pray pray that when I wake up tomorrow morning I wont have to limp around.