I have responsibilities!!!
Monday, March 15, 2010
So as my body has told me many times that I need to take a break...I figured it out this weekend. Though my body has given up on me several times this past month, for several different reasons, it wasn't until after two particularly difficult workouts that I figured out WHY.
I did two workouts this past week, Biggest Loser Cardio Max and Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. Neither workout took more than 20 minutes when Im used to 60 minute workouts but they were more towards muscle v/s moving. By Saturday I was barely able to sit...or should I say, get to the setting position and get up from it. It was also very difficult to use my arms, lifting, pushing, pulling ect hurt...ALOT. Though my mind kept telling me...You need to get up and work out, my body kept telling me "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING??? Im barely moving as it is!!!"
While this battle is going on between my mind and my body I make a discovery. I have responsibilities!!! Responsibilities in my life that require my body to work...properly. The kind that require me to sit, stand, squat, lift, push, pull.....I think you get the point by now. At work I am constantly having to get up and down from my desk and walk to and from different departments...I have to be able to do so and prefer not to look like I have been riding a horse all weekend while I do so! I have a very active 2 1/2 year old that requires me to chase and lift and hug and cuddle and rock and play with (again, you get the picture).
So, though I want to lose this weight, I can not push my body past the point of being able to carry on my "normal" responsibilities!!! I want to lose this weight...yes, maybe for health in the long run, but when I look at the here and now...I want to lose weight to look good. I cant let vainity get in the way of my daily responsibilites. I cant let the WANT to look good in front of my friends that I havent seen in years when I go home in May keep me from being able to care for my son. My son is what is most important in my life right now and I need to be able to pick him up and hug him without crying out in pain. My son needs Mommy to chase him and play with him and tuck him into bed at night...not carry him in there and stand him up in bed and tell him to lay down because Mommy cant bend over right now to lay him down and tuck him in!
I have responsibilities and I will lose weight....responsibly.