The super(bowl) hard boiled egg
Sunday, February 07, 2010
I'm making a bunch of stuff for Superbowl and even though they are a cholesterol nightmare, I get a hair up the backside to do just one more thing. Deviled eggs. I have half a dozen different mixes from curry to sweet pickle to bacon jalapeno and I mix them up individually in a freezer bag, nip the corner off, and squirt the filling into the egg whites for a tasty assortment. I started with 4 dozen eggs (when did the price go up?) and I've never had problem cooking eggs before tonight and now I realize just how freaking pissed off trying to peel an egg can make a guy! I swear to God I almost threw one against the sliding glass door. Instead I smashed it hard as I could in my clenched fist, very much enjoying the sight of the pasty yellow bird food oozing out between my fingers. Everyone of those dam things gave me fits. The shell would remove with it, 1/16th" on the top of the egg, to 1/4" on the bottom of the egg, of egg white. I was left with, by and large, a yolk with a whimpy little white membrane layer around it. Worthless. Although I actually am known as an accomplished chef,I got on line and researched egg cooking because no one was around to see me. There were a variety of instructions, but for the most part, they called for placing the eggs in the pan and covering with cold water, then 1 minute of boiling, followed by 10 to 15 minutes soaking in the hot water, and then a quick cooling in cold water with ice. Some talked about salt and a little white vinegar to be added to the water. A thorough crackling of the shell by first rolling it was also encouraged. I decided to test my own unpublished theory by cooking one more dozen eggs, all from the same batch as the first. I believed that it's in the egg. No matter what the hell you do, if you have a fresh egg, your screwed and if the first egg don't peel for ya, change direction and make egg salad! The 5th dozen was cooked diligently to the prescribed methods. The result? Not a gall darn bit of freaking difference, just as suspected!! Now I need to run to the store and get some bread for my egg yolk salad sandwiches!! Anybody know of a good window washer??