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PMS is a hard time to overcome, but...

Monday, October 09, 2006

Last week I was PMSing (premenstrual) , which means I go through the full range of emotions. On the worst of these days(Friday) I became so flustered I wanted to cry and go to sleep, but surprisingly I pressed on and eventually the mood lifted. In hindsight, I was very impressed by my behavior and could only classify it as a carry-over effect of exercising. I have recently been very deliberate about pushing myself while working out and I think that that this thought process is spilling over into other aspects of my life, which is great, cuz I am the the queen of "I don't want to" and no thing or no-one can move me from that place but me.

During PMS, I also have 2 major problematic eating habits 1-don't eat at all and 2-eat whatever I want without constraint or consideration, usually anything chocolate. I designed my program so I have weekends off. No counting calories or being anal about grams of fat. But Thursday I was having cravings that I knew would blow me out the water as it related to calorie and fat intake. To prevent a total bout of self destructive behavior, I negotiated (with myself) that I would trade in one of my weekend days. So no counting on thursday, but definitely counting on Sunday. This worked out well, because truthfully it proved to me that I truly do care about this process, more than I have in the past. Past efforts have gone like this-"don't do it Toya, don't eat it Toya. It's over if you do it.." Then I give in and it is all downhill from there. I don't go get back on track. So my new approach is to relax and take one day at a time, be consistent- yet too rigid, and be very deliberate about every decision I make.

I want this more this time around and have a bit more determination to defeat the self-sabotaging monster.

Having a place to record all of this is also wonderful-thanx to Sparkpeople.com!

Tootlz-TnC
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