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starting over 1/13/10

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

I was standing in line at the concession stand at the movies when I looked at people all around me, most of them skinny and fit. I felt aloof because of how I was feeling in the inside and my reflection towards the outside world. I let myself go. Inside I was crying for help and sobbing with pain. I had almost lost 24 pounds and more if I wasn't so fustrated and down. We moved to Washington State and that is where I slowly gained all the weight back. I got depressed and gloomy due to being unemployed and restarting a new life with no one I knew except our friends that are on the other side of washington. I missed the sun. I loved it there because of the nature and how it was so beautiful but I missed the sun.

We made a u-turn and moved back home. Here I am now trying to put the puzzles of my life together. It took a lot out of me to restart this but here I am. I hope I stay focused. I need to lose weight for myself and if I want to get pregnant. I have been wanting kids for eight years but until I help myself, how can I possible help others? Just a thought. I hope this will be a great journey and I miss being slim a little. Here we go.. tune in as I re-continue this journey...lots of prayers...and lots of sparkpeople...


Just meeh,
Mari

P.s. to my sparkepeople friends that continue to inspire me ... sorry I haven't been in touch..miss you all and happy holidays... your in my thoughts...hoping you will cheer me on this journey called "life" :)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LORI815
    Hi Mari,
    I think a lot of us have had some sort of "stall" in our journey for a healthier us. We might not all be going through the exact same situations but we can all relate to some degree. Acknowledging what's been happening is a HUGE thing. It's easier to tuck it away and not look at what we're doing to ourselves. We get caught up in life and think I don't have the time or the energy to do this. We can though. We have to remember that we aren't just here, plugging along trying to get through each day. We have to live each day. We have to be apart of it and being apart of it is jumping in. Whether we get in gradually or just take a plunge...we have to participate.
    I can relate. For the past (I don't know how many months) I've kind of sat on the sidelines, just trying to get through each day without living it...participating in it. Thinking I was alone. We aren't though. There are so many of us out there. All needing encouragement, friendship and in many cases a reminder. We're all a bunch of sparks. Like fireflies in the dark, individually we're just a little blip but put a bunch of us together...what a lightshow! We can do this. Together we can be the person we know we can be. Together we can get through anything. Together we shine!
    Hope things are going better for you. Remember PMA! Positive Mental Attitude!

    emoticon
    3660 days ago
  • SPARKLYGIRL66
    Oh Mari, it is so good to hear from you! Sounds like you have been through an awful lot, so have I girl, we are practically in the same boat together. Well I am glad to see you back on here. Let's inspire each other! Can't wait to hear from you.

    Your friend
    Kristen
    3660 days ago
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