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Introduction Text WOW, 2020 already huh, halfway through as a matter of fact... As anyone can see by reading my whole intro, I have been back and forth for years. Losing, and gaining and losing again... and gaining again. I've left an abusive marriage, got remarried to my best friend, had my two older sons come back into my life only to lose one to being shot and killed at the age of 19, and returning to being estranged from my oldest once again. I've moved 6 times in 4 years, barely managed to keep my job after being on mental health leave for 4 months after a mental breakdown in December 2019. Sometimes I feel like I should have just crawled into a hole and pulled the dirt in after me long ago. But I won't, I can't, no matter how many times I have to begin again, I won't stop beginning because I know one of these days it will be the last time I begin... I will see the end. I have changed my eating plan, I follow purple points on WW now. I've been really wishy-washy for a month now, lost, and gained back the same 7 lbs. several times now. Time to stop being wishy-washy. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It is now December 2019. My best friend is now my husband, and I have a new job and it feels like a whole new vision of life. I changed doctors after trying and trying to lose and not losing although I followed things perfectly. I found out I had a ton of things wrong with my hormones, thyroid, and depression medication. I've spent the last year getting this all fixed and working toward getting back to basics. On September 4 I stepped on the scale at the doctor's office and found I had gained back 82 lbs of the 180 I had originally lost. I was getting close to 400 again. I stepped back and decided THIS STOPS NOW!! That exact same day I started changing things. I am not done yet, I still want this, I still believe I can and will do this! Eating Plan: I am still following Jillian Michael's 30 day eating plan. Beginning Goals: ~Out of the house at least 5 days per week. ~At least 5000 steps per day. ~ Follow my eating plan to get back on track. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I began this journey in Feb 2011. By Jan 2012 I had lost 176 lbs. My world also fell apart that month when my husband and I split up and the stress began. In March of the same year we got back together but much to my dismay, in the end, it was not a good thing. Over the last 4 years, I have been up and down and gained over 60 lbs. My now ex-husband and I split for good, and I haven't felt this free of stress and negativity ever in my life! I have a great support system, my best friend and my son, and I am ready to do this! I am still down 117 lbs and ready to rock this all the way to the finish line for good!! Eating Plan: I am still following Chris Powell's Carb Cycling. Beginning Goals: ~Out of the house at least 6 days per week to the gym. ~At least 5000 steps per day. ~ Follow my eating plan to get back on track. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Well obviously my goals have fallen by the way side a bit... oh who we kidding, a LOT! However I thoroughly believe that success comes through failure and the only true failure is giving up which I am NOT about to do! SO... HERE WE GO AGAIN!!! NEW GOAL: 09/01/2014: I am following Chris Powell's carb cycling plan so I may as well set my goals as he would if I was under his care. Soooo... I am going to set my 90 day weigh-in goal at 60 lbs! So, by 12/01/2014 I need to take off 60 lbs! I KNOW I can do this!! ------------------------------------------------------- 03/27/2014: NEW GOAL: Be below 300 by 04/15/2014! LET'S ROCK THIS!! 02/18/2014: Life has improved much in the last year. Stress is still a bit high due to starting our own business but it turned out to be successful. In December of 2013 we finally were able to put a down payment on a home and was able to get out of the very unhealthy situation we were in for a year and a half. I promised myself as soon as we were able to get everything settled I would get back to it! I have! 02/18/2014: I am back and ready to rock! Weigh In: 334.2 lbs. Gained: 43 lbs. total since lowest weigh in. I feel it's important to take a look at the failures as well as the successes because both are what make us who we are and get us where we are going. I learn from my failures just as much if not more than my successes! I am eager to get this story finished and take off the other 180 lbs I need to get off. I am still struggling with motivation but am "faking it till I make it" and it is getting better every day! I was not fairing well on the low carb plan that my bariatric doctor put me on. Turned out I was way too active to have such low carb days all the time; however, the low carb days were working, I was just lethargic and feeling like crap all the time. Changed my plan - I am no longer on a diet plan, I do not chose to "find" what I have lost, I am transforming my life to lose and change the way I look at food! Welcome all who wish to friend me, I lose to motivate others, and hope to get motivated too! 08/2013: Life got a bit worse actually after I tried to begin again in Feb of 2013. We lost our home, and a lot of what we owned, and had to move into a very unhealthy situation where I was not able to get through a day without getting sick several times, let alone being able to workout. 02/10/2013: Tracked Goals and Successes (and Failures) since 03/26/2011... 04/25/2012: One Year Sparkversary 09/26/2012: One Year Surgeversary. 02/10/2013: Weigh In: 313.6 lbs. Gained: 22.4 lbs. 2/10/2013: I come back to SP... AGAIN, after a very rough 2012 year. I am working toward getting back on track, setting new goals and beginning a new plan that I think will allow me to stay on track better than before. I am looking forward to finding my way back to the positive and spunky me that I found a year ago behind the 176 lbs I have already lost. And I plan on working hard to take off the rest that I need to lose! 03/26/2012: Tracked Goals and Successes since 05/25/2011... 5/25/2011 = 1 month Sparkversary! 6/25/2011 = 2 month Sparkversary! 7/9/2011 = Said good-bye to 400 for good! 8/3/2011 = 100 days on Spark People! 8/7/2011 = Dropped BMI below 60... hit 59.9 for a total loss of 8.8 points! 9/15/11 = weight hit 365.6 lbs. HIT 100 lbs lost goal!! 9/26/11 = SurgeryDate: weigh in: 362.6 lbs. Total loss of 104.4 before surgery! 12/25/11 = BMI hit 50 for a total loss of 18.7. 12/26/11 = 3 months Post Op... 315 lbs. 152lbs. weight lost so far. (47.6 lbs. since surgery). 1/2/12 = FINALLY left the abusive relationship I was in! 2/19/12 = BACK ON TRACK! 3/7/12 = Said good-bye to 300! 3/26/12 = 6 Months Post Op... 291.2 lbs. = 175.8 lbs. lost so far. (71.4 since surgery) On 9/26/11 I had Bariatric Sleeve surgery. I am currently emerging into a new chapter of life as a brand new being, fragile yet strong and learning to fly again. I hope to be that beautiful butterfly that makes an onlooker catch their breathe... not yet but someday! Want to know more about me, I absolutely love new friends, check out my blogs and allow me to encourage just as so many have encouraged me! On 4/25/11 I re-entered Spark People for the zillionth time in my life... FOR THE FINAL time in my life! Since then I have crawled out of my cocoon: beaten depression and anxiety, taken control of my own journey, put people in my life, (who stood in the way), in their place, and learned to appreciate those who ARE there to support me! 2/24/2011 = Official first weigh in: 467 lbs.

I want to learn to eat to live, not live to eat! 2/24/2011 = Official first weigh in: 467 lbs. ----------------------- 3/26/12 = 6 Months Post Op... 291.2 lbs. = 175.8 lbs. lost so far. (71.4 since surgery) ----------------------- 02/10/2013: Back again after a rough year. Weigh In: 313.6 lbs. Gained: 22.4 lbs. ----------------------- 02/18/2014: Weigh In: 334.2 lbs. Gained: 43 lbs. total since lowest weigh in. ----------------------- 03/06/2016: I am back and ready to rock this to the finish line!! Weigh In: 350 lbs. Gained: 49.8 lbs. total since lowest weigh in. Still down 117 lbs. since beginning! ------------------------

I am following Chris Powell's Carb Cycling Plan. This allows me to have the great burn days of low carb eating and yet still give my body carbs 2 days per week so that I do not feel like crap over all! My plan looks like this: Sunday: High Carb = Approx 1800 calories. (With a cheat meal if I chose to) Monday: Low Carb = Approx 1200 calories. Tuesday: Low Carb = Approx 1200 calories. Wednesday: High Carb = Approx 1800 calories (No Cheat). Thursday: Low Carb = Approx 1200 calories. Friday: Low Carb = Approx 1200 calories. Saturday: Low Carb = Approx 1200 calories. I workout 6 days per week: Chris' 9 minute missions M - F and an additional 30 - 90 minutes per day all 6 days. Rest on Sunday.

44 yrs old Live in Southern Illinois Married for 10 years. 1 wonderful son

Love Chris Powell! Jillian Michaels workouts. Zumba, Biggest Loser, Billy Blanks Tae Bo, Spark Videos. Walking Dead fan! Survivor Fan! Biggest Loser Fan! Amazing Race Fan! True Blood Fan!

Add a Link "Do or do not, there is no try." -Yoda "I stopped stuffing my face when I started facing my stuff." - Sparker "If you change nothing, nothing will change" -unknown <link>facebook.com/kgroves70</link>
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